Curse of the Cursing Stone

This has gotten a lot of press, and it tickles me: an artistic sculpture carved with the world's longest known curse in Carlisle is being blamed with the town's misfortunes in past years. There's a vote on as to whether the town should pay for it to be destroyed to rid them of their bad luck. One story is at BBC - Cumbria: Curse of the Cursing Stone.

The curse itself, a 16th century curse attributed to the Archbishop of Glasgow and aimed at the lawless raiders (reivers) of the borderlands, is vivid and vitriolic. It's also very comprehensive:

I curse them going and I curse them riding; I curse them standing and I curse them sitting; I curse them eating and I curse them drinking; I curse them rising, and I curse them lying; I curse them at home, I curse them away from home; I curse them within the house, I curse them outside of the house; I curse their wives, their children, and their servants who participate in their deeds.

And there are about 18 other paragraphs with details on what should happen to them. But surprisingly, it ends on an upbeat note, as curses go!